Wedding Traditions for Fathers | UPlanIt Celebrates Father’s Day!
“Never be afraid to ask for advice and experience!”
Have you thought about the role your father will play at your wedding? There are plenty of traditions your Dad can follow, but remember the one thing we constantly say: It’s your wedding, YOUR way! Out of any of the traditions we mention today, don’t worry if you don’t want to partake in them, and if you need another family member to step in for your Father on your wedding day, you can always use these traditions with them as well. In addition, if you have multiple fathers, feel free to adapt any traditions to best suit your needs! When we mention “Father of the Bride” or “Father of the Groom”, we wholly encourage you to interpret and use these traditions to fit your own desires and plans — inclusivity is one of our main goals in these blogs after all. All in all, your wedding day should be the best day of your life and nothing should stop you from having the perfect day!
First and foremost, your Father(s) should always come to you first and ask what you need. No matter what tradition says about which side of the family funds each part of the wedding or who walks down the aisle with whom, your family needs to respect your choices. There are plenty of tasks to be assigned, and your parents are likely to have great advice from their own experiences!
Both partner’s fathers (either bride or groom) can have similar roles when it comes down to the wedding planning, preparation and event. Traditionally, the parents must write a list of the family members and their friends that they’d like to have invited to the wedding, and to keep track of those specific RSVPS so the couple doesn’t have to chase down late replies! They can also help to research any family, cultural or religious traditions to include on the wedding day — after all, your father is likely to have gone through this before and it’s important to rely on all sources of help when planning your wedding. Never be afraid to ask for advice and experience! If you’re including a tradition that may need to be explained to guests (such as friends from another culture), ask your father(s) to proof-read any wedding programs or invitations you’re sending out, just to be sure it’s correct.
One more thing for both sides to keep an eye on is the outfit choices. It’d be very stressful for the couple if they were the ones keeping track of every outfit and dress code in the two wedding parties, so both parental sides traditionally must keep the other informed of their clothing choices. You don’t want both parents turning up with the same hats and suits, or entirely different clashing colours!
Traditionally the father figure of the groom pays for the corsages, boutonnieres, marriage license and officiant fees, but most people today believe in paying for their own wedding and letting their parents pitch in when needed. When it comes to buying suits, it’s helpful to have your father along with you to advise you on what outfit or suit to wear that will compliment your ideas and themes. They may have gone suit shopping before so take every bit of advice you can get — if they haven’t, it’s still nice to have a second opinion. While it’s common for the father of the bride and the father of the groom to wear the same outfits as the groom and his wedding party, there’s no need to stick this if you come across some great suits for them to wear that fit your theme!
It’s also common for the father of the groom to accompany his son’s wedding party while everyone gets ready before the ceremony, and while the best man is likely the one to be reassuring the groom, it’s always nice to hear a bit of reassurance from your father as well. Cracking a joke, offering a hug, and just being there will mean a lot in a lot of ways. A wedding is an emotional event, so it’s normal to shed a tear or two! Another tradition before the ceremony is to walk the groom’s mother (or if the father is remarried, his wife) down the aisle after his son, and later stand at the receiving line with the newlyweds and the rest of the bride’s family, welcoming them to the wedding celebrations and thanking the guests for coming. No matter who is paying for what at the wedding, it’s good to share the responsibility of hosting with the family, and getting rid of the last few bits of stress the couple may have.
The father of the bride has different traditions but a lot of them are similar — keep calm, provide support, offer help where needed etc, but there are other traditions specific to the bride’s side. For instance, on the wedding day it’s traditional for the father of the bride to accompany his daughter in the car/limousine to the ceremony, and also to walk her down the aisle. However we understand that people may not wish to partake in these traditions, and you can always adjust your plans if your situation makes it difficult to keep to tradition. For example, if you also have a step-father, why not ask him to walk you down the aisle alongside your biological father? Whatever you choose, remember it should make you happy first and foremost!
There are also other traditions you may want to alter, such as the tradition where the father of the bride foots the bill for the entire wedding. If you’d rather, you can always ask for financial aid when it suits you — your father is there to help!
In the end, it’s important for both fathers to be there for the couple. Fathers are a great source of information and comfort, especially during stressful times when you want everything to be perfect. Lean on them, and ask for help when you need to.
Do you have any stories about your father on your wedding day? Let us know in the comments or via our social media — we’d love to hear about them!
See you next week.
Facebook: UPlanIt / Twitter: @uplanit_online / Instagram: @uplanit_online
