UPlanIt honours International Men’s Day
“Why not thank your guests as a couple, and invite your closest friend to make a heartfelt speech to cover for others who feel uncomfortable with public speaking?”
Bridal shops are everywhere, and when you go to plan a wedding, people still ask you about what the bride wants, rather than what the man wants. A simple google search proves that advertisers think a wedding is all about what the bride wants. Of course, a lot of men differ on whether they like marriage or not, but the stereotype of women planning the wedding is still strong, and of course, this can influence advertising. As an example, we searched ‘Wedding Adverts’ in Google and out of the 15 that appeared, 7 were brides with grooms, 2 lacked a wedding couple, and 6 had lone brides, meaning there were 13 brides overall out of 15 images being advertised. However, we think that men are still an important part of the wedding process, and need to be catered to at the same level!
The good news is that there are a lot more wedding suppliers catering to towards the groom! Yes, there have always been suit shops and tailors, but what about a day fitting akin to a bride’s dress fitting? A day where employees cater only to you and what you find most comfortable and stylish for your big day? Well, now you can have that too! For example, you can book a private showroom at Master Debonair where professional stylists can be on hand to give you advice on coordination and a tailoring team is available to adjust any suit to your measurements. As for shoes, you could have your own shoes tailored and created to your style, dyed in the colours you choose. The Hand Dyed Shoe Company involves design consultation, fittings, and together you create your own shoes for your own big day.
As for planning the wedding, there’s no rule that says you can’t get involved. Suppliers will be glad to be working with the both of you, since that way they won’t have to worry about someone not liking the decorations, or disapproving of the schedule. Remember, you’ve got your partner to lean on with these decisions — you’re not going about it alone! Rely on each other when you need to, and listen to each other’s ideas. If you don’t like the idea of having a wedding but you’re doing it for your partner, stand with them at their decisions and add a little of your own flair to it. Ask for more free time between the ceremony and dinner, or discuss budgeting options. Even if you aren’t particularly bothered about the wedding day, you can still offer advice on your partner’s opinions and offer ideas to help that can make your memories last a lifetime.
So, let’s say you’ve got your outfit sorted — that’s one more thing you don’t have to worry about. But what about the speeches? According to polls done by YouGov, statistics say that people would rather the Groom, Best Man or Father of the Bride speak instead of any of the bridal party. We know it can be stressful addressing a crowd, so we thought, why not just go against tradition? It’s your wedding, It should be done YOUR WAY. A speech is a good way to thank your guests for celebrating with you, but it doesn’t have to be a lengthy affair, nor does it have to be done individually. Why not thank your guests as a couple, and invite your closest friend to make a heartfelt speech to cover for others who feel uncomfortable with public speaking? Of course, you don’t have to invite them at all (some may even thank you for relieving them of speech duty!) but if they offer their services, don’t be afraid to ask them about what they’re going to say. You don’t want any uncomfortable subjects being talked about that’ll make you or your partner feel awkward on their special day. A good friend will always understand and prioritise your wellbeing over their jokes about you falling over in primary school.
If you’re concerned about the pre-wedding plans (the stag/hen dos) then here’s a couple of suggestions from us; first, talk to your wedding party about it. If you want to go crazy, make sure one of your party can reel you back in. If you want to have some more rules, make sure to remind your party about that. Just like with speeches, good friends will always put your happiness first in this case. It’s your event and you’re the priority. You could even plan a joint party with your partner if you don’t feel comfortable with the idea of a separate night/event. Rent out a venue you both love and celebrate with your friends, have a night in with your closest friends and play games with each other. Or if you’d rather make it more personal, go out for a meal with your partner. Have a candle-lit dinner to ease the stress you may be feeling about your big day, or even better, get a takeaway! Relax and remember, you’re not in this alone.
Finally, there’s the topic of stress. It’s no secret that planning a wedding day can make you feel strained and exhausted, but don’t be afraid to ask for help. Studies have shown that men are less likely to ask for help when they’re stressed or suffering from mental health issues, and we want to encourage men to seek assistance when they need it. The YouGov survey, polling more than 2,500 people who have had mental health problems, showed 28% of men admitted that they had not sought medical help, compared with 19% of women, and we want to help change that. We think it’s brave to seek help when you’re stressed or struggling; no one will judge you or even tell others you’re there. Even if it’s just asking a friend to support you through the rough times — it’s a great first step.
We’ll be scouring future wedding fairs for more male attire centred suppliers, so watch this space for more amazing content!
See you next week.
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Photo credit: @Uplanit, @thematthoward.
