Planning A Wedding During A Pandemic? | Midnight Musing
“Don’t make concrete decisions on an uneasy foundation…”
It’s not been easy in lockdown, and planning a wedding while there’s still so much uncertainty around what kind of precautions will be used on your chosen date can make everything that much more complicated to arrange. Whilst I’ve had plenty of time to come up with ideas and plan out small parts here and there, I still have that unnerving feeling at the back of my mind when trying to put a concrete decision on things like dates and attendees. Most of my close family come under the ‘At Risk’ label, and while they’ll likely be fully vaccinated by my wedding day, I still have to take into consideration what my venue will be like closer to my chosen date. Basically, if I’m stressed, then everyone else planning their wedding at the moment must be as well!
But rather than be down about it, I’m going to change my view of it all. Keeping a diary of my plans and feelings has really helped organise all my thoughts on the matter, and helped me prioritise what can be done as opposed to what I think should be done. For example, there’s no point in getting myself worked up about who’s going to sit where if it’s going to change in the future for reasons beyond my control. I can come up with ideas about it, but making concrete plans about my Auntie sitting next to my Mam seems redundant if it turns out that’s not the case. I have a bad habit of coming up with a plan and sticking to it, and when the situation changes and my plans need to change in order to work, I end up lost and indecisive. So — don’t make concrete decisions on an uneasy foundation, but still, come up with a couple of drafts for when there’s a more solid base to work from.
There’s also plenty of ways to research different aspects that I might not have thought of without journaling my thoughts. I created a Checklist on my Uplanit account of important parts of my wedding that I’d like to tackle, along with traditions that I may or may not want to include. For example, I decided against having confetti in order to avoid excess waste, and I don’t really want to be walked down the aisle and given away. The tool let me put an end date on my checklist points, which really helps my stress levels when I see I don’t actually have to work out the guest list fully until months from now!
I can also make a budget by adding suppliers to the budgeter tool, but at the moment using the Compare list is a better option since I want to work out the different prices. Even if I decide not to go with their services, I can still compare their prices, work with others and work out the standard that I’m willing to stick to, while worrying about the budget and solid booking plans later. Budgeting different suppliers without settling on one is okay to do, but looking into alternatives like making my own bouquets with fake flowers and unique accessories can be great too. I’m still unsure which I’d rather have because on the one hand, flowers can be composted after the fact and there’s no worry about keeping too many keepsakes, but on the other hand, they’d be great as keepsakes for the bridal party and groom party (buttonholes etc). Plus I’d have plenty of time to work on them since I don’t know when I’ll be able to have my wedding date, so they wouldn’t bite into my budget too much if I spread the cost around like I did with my Halloween decorations. I’m still keeping the idea of finding a supplier that can create fake flower bouquets as well though, just to keep my options open!
Another side to planning in lockdown is keeping track of my stress levels. The pandemic is tense and grim enough without having to plan an incredibly important day in my life! I’ve found it’s important to decompress and take plenty of breaks to avoid getting mentally strained. Video games, a good book, even just doing some cross-stitch with a chill playlist in the background. Alternatively, if you get too panicked about something, I find breathing exercises combined with puzzles helps! I live with anxiety and a lot of that revolves around a fight or flight instinct in my brain over normal common-day things like calling the doctors, and doing puzzles can help focus your brain on something other than the fight or flight instinct, or at least that’s how it helps me. Everyone is different in how they manage their mental health and what their limits are, which is why I’d recommend creating a self-care system for yourself as well! Self-care can range from facemasks and relaxation to just allowing yourself time to read that book you’ve been meaning to pick up. It’s all about making time for yourself, giving yourself a break and recuperating, even just for a little while.
Planning a wedding can be stressful, but it’s important to make time for yourself while you plan. We’re going through a pandemic and the way I’m managing it alongside planning a wedding is to prioritise myself and what I can do — what’s your tactic for managing?
See you next week.
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